Hawai'i, Here I Come!

Well, my birthday weekend is over and I have just a minute to write about it.  If you read my Redemption post, you know that Peter left Hawaii on my birthday last year.  It was not his choice, by any means, but it's just the way our situation worked out at the time.  A few of my sweet friends in Kohala had a mini kid-included birthday celebration for me.  I remember being so relieved that we were all safe and my husband was on his way to getting the support he needed.  Even though it was probably my worst birthday ever, I still received my birthday wish:  my husband was going to be okay.  Funny how a crisis can bring what matters most to the forefront of our desires.

Enough about the past... I had almost no expectations for my birthday this year because it just came at a really busy and money-tight time, sandwiched in between Peter's album release and the baby shower of a dear friend.  Peter has been consumed with our remodel lately, so I didn't expect so much as a card from him.  I headed to the mall in search of new shoes and was welcomed by the sound of Hawaiian music.  I followed the wonderfully familiar sound to the center of the mall only to discover a most unusual sight (in Redding, anyway)--hula dancers! Smiling as I watched them, it felt like Hawaii came to me on my birthday.  Yes, even though almost all of them were haoles.  So I posted this photo on Facebook:

Hawaii came to me on my birthday!

Satisfied with my birthday experience up to that point, I later walked out of the mall in my new Danskos.   For dinner I decided to invite my family and a couple of friends to join us at Grilla Bites, my favorite place to eat in Redding.  I ordered six slices of various raw pie gloriousness to share around the table in lieu of a gluten- and sugar-full birthday cake.  While waiting for our food, I saw a stack of birthday cards in front of me.  I grabbed the first one and ripped it open without even looking at who it was from.  There was a folded piece of paper in it and I just quickly skimmed it, noticing the word Hawaii in there somewhere.  I'm not sure why, but I quickly closed the card and went for the next card.  And the next one.  Then I went back to the mysterious Hawaii card.  What is this and who is it from?

Oh wow.  Oh wow.  {uncontrollable sobbing ensues without warning}  Really overwhelmed.  I didn't even know where Peter was.  Finally I found him behind me playing with the kids and, when he saw my face, he knew I had opened his card.  He just started laughing.  And I could faintly hear my sister next to me.  Um, are you laughing? Or crying? Are you okay? But I was lost in my own world of disbelief that I would actually be visiting my beloved Kohala.  And soon! The sadness hit when I saw my boys' faces and how badly they wanted to go to Hawaii with me.  It doesn't feel right to go alone.  I had hoped this would be a family vacation, a time to visit a place we once called home together.  I left Hawaii without my husband and really hoped we'd return together at some point.  But that moment will have to wait a while longer.  This trip will be short and sweet, but I will savor every moment of it.


Best.  Birthday.  Ever.